Dumbass Doctors And One Maybe Good One

Well, as I may or may not have mentioned before, I have already set up my first prenatal visit with a doctor's office. We thought about it over the weekend. We decided that we'd like to have the baby at the hospital in Michigan City instead of the hospital here. So, I called the hospital and got the names of some of the best doctors. I, then, tried to call all three of these doctors (during normal business hours even!), and got NO ANSWER at any of the offices. I was shocked. How can three different doctors all take the same day off or whatever was going on. They had answering machines, sure, but where the hell is a bitchy receptionist when you need one? Come on doc's! Get your shit together.

So, after all the hullaballoo that ensued afterwards and my panic attack. I decided that I'll stay with the same doctor that I called in the first place. Afterall, I was genuainely impressed when I called that a doctor answered my questions and the receptionist called me back very quickly with the answer! The doctor even said that I could come in early if I wanted to and, in my book, that a huge plus! Most doctors are such assholes anymore. It's increasingly hard to find a doctor who truly cares about their patients these days. So, I am hoping that this doctor is the right one for me, for our baby, and as far as it all goes--she's going to have to be right for Paul too because we all know how he hates having a weirdo look at his vagina!

Terror of the Night

As last night progressed, I lay balled into the fetal position on my couch trying to cry quietly so as to not wake Paul. I think that I have never felt such pain as I have felt with this period. Interesting it is since I do not have PCOS or endometriosis or any other condition that should cause such awful pain and cramping. All of my doctor's were sure that endometriosis was the cause of the pain because in my younger years I would breeze through my periods like they weren't even there. Often, I had found myself bragging at how lucky I was to never get even a hint of PMS, save a little exhaustion int he days leading up to my period. Those were the good old days. The days where I didn't own a heating pad and definitely had no need for one. I managed to catch about 45 minutes of rest before Paul came strolling to the living room ready to leave for work with all his chains and prison guard garb dangling around in a raucous. I finally broke down and took a half dose of Excedrin at nearly 5am. Although it did help to ease the pain, I then had nagging thoughts that wouldn't allow sleep to wash over me.

As most anyone would know who reads my blog, Haley is gone with her father for the holiday break until January 5th. Yesterday, I called her father's phone, answered by his ever sweet girlfriend, who informed me that Haley had gone out to lunch with sperm donor's mother. She was supposed to call me back within an hour. That hour came and passed with no call. I called back later in the day, sure that it had just been an oversight and no big deal. Well, then there was no answer. So, I left a message. Yet, still there has been no call back. This leaves me worried, to say the least. I have the uncanny feeling that my daughter is miserable. She wants to come home and they don't want her to talk to me yet because they know that she will tell me exactly what is going on. Those fuckers. However, I could be incredibly wrong in my thinking. Somehow, my momma gut is kicking in and telling me otherwise. I think I'm right in my thinking, and will continue to think I'm right until I hear Haley tell me that she's having fun there. There is a nag that won't let me sleep. Then, my mind wanders to what shit I'm going to have to go through with the court system to resolve this problem. What great flaming hoops they'll have me jump through and in which ridiculous costume? Please imagine my fat ass in one of those tight little unitards asscheeks but half clad in sequins and the rest hanging out for the world to count the ass dimples. Don't forget in this vision to include the barely there breasts smashed flat in the overly tight attire and the rolls of back fat that undoubtedly will be impossible to conceal in that shiny little number. Oh, oh, and then there are the thighs, and you know I only shave to just above the knee....so use you're imagination. Bikini line...oh lord, the bikini line....like I have an afro wig shoved into the crotch of that leotard....

Back to the story now that you have a full picture of what the court makes you do to get anything done....

Now, I'm just pissed off. I'm all in a rage and I swear on all that is Holy....if my phone doesn't ring today I am going to beat the living shit out of SOMEONE. Then, just for kicks, I'll call sperm donor's mother and give her a piece of my mind too. She's oh so fun, barrel of laughs kinda fun, to scream at. Besides, she takes all my threats seriously and actually calls him and his girlfriend and let's them have it. And if that really doesn't work....sperm donor's grandmother will be next on the list because she loves me dearly to this day, and she's one tough old bitch who will never let anyone hear the end of it if I call her bitching. And last, but not least, then I'll put on my sparkly outfit, jump through flaming hoops, and really get him in a whole shit storm of paper work and court dates. This mother is NOT to be fucked with especially when I have PMS!!

How's that for being a "fucking cunt," Jeremy?

By the way....on the phone the other day he thought himself terribly witty by calling me a "fucking cunt," repeatedly. I mean, does he think he's the first person to call me that? God, no. He can't really be that stupid. Can he? I mean, I am a fucking cunt, but I don't think that's a news flash to anyone and certainly not to me! He's so brilliant....I mean, brilliantly ignorant that it's entertaining. I hope he sees padded walls and men in white coats just once in his life....and if there is a God, I will be there to watch them drag him off.

The Sunday-Monday Slur

Oh yes, this incomnia has been playing hell on me all weekend. I haven't slept at night in 2 days! Thank goodness Paul was off this weekend because he has been up with Haley during the day while I slept. However, tomorrow its back to school for Haley and Mommy really needs to be on a daytime schedule. So, this current....thing....I have going, it's just not going to work. So, here we have what's known as the Sunday-Monday slur. I woke up on Sunday at some point after noon. I will now stay up, get Paul off to work, Haley off to school....stay up all day and then go to bed at a normal time. I am sure I will be thoroughly exhausted by then and sleep will be no problem. I can't wait....a good night's sleep seems like a dream right now!!

On an up note though, Cain is feeling and looking better. Well, technically, he's just less lumpy than he was a few days ago. Thank goodness. However, he's still miserable. He's itched himself so bad over the last couple days and now he has several area's that have pretty good scabs going. I hope that we can get through this soon because his itching is driving me nuts!!! That's all I seem to hear all day long!

Recent Events

I know that I haven't talked to people much lately so here are a few of the current events around my household:

Haley's First Parent-Teacher Conference:
Didn't go so hot. I really expected more from Haley. Although she seems to have a solid grasp of what has been taught and is ahead on many subjects, she is a class clown and a disturbance to other students. I can't say I was surprised to hear this. I knew this was my future with Haley for a long time. I used to joke that one day I would be on a first name basis with her principal when she was smaller. Haley also seems to be messing around alot instead of doing her work. So, to make up for the time she spent talking, she then scribbles what she is supposed to be coloring and stuff. It's ridiculous in my mind how a 5 year old has SO much to talk about that she just can't keep it in another minute! I mean, afterall, her life has been so full of great things, that she has some divine wisdom to share with her peers. She is also irritating the life out of me with her school "journal". The child can write, yet, she refuses to do so. She is supposed to be writing "I like to ride my scooter" and she writes "abadokdneudos" all in a slur!! So, when she gets home I make her rewrite in on the other side of the paper and she does it perfectly! What is up with this kid?

The Great Make-up:
Paul and I have been on the outs the last couple of months. There was alot involved, but we have finally made up. I am happy and relieved. I was feeling quite depressed about all of it there for awhile, but it seems that the changing leaves and the cooler weather have brought me out of my funk. It's a great feeling to finally feel alive again!